The Moraliser

We all know that our morals enrich our lives. They are the things that guide us, set our standards & are how we hold ourselves accountable to others.

But have you ever met a Moraliser?

A person who seeks to impose their views on others, telling them how to live & behave. They want you to conform & comply with their preferences. They defend their actions by saying they are trying to defend you from harm.

Now, everyone is entitled to a view as to what counts as acceptable behaviour & to discuss that as artfully & positively as possible.

But the Moraliser tends to attack, whinge, moan, gossip, impose.

They claim to represent the majority but in reality they are on their own.

The true motive is that they are afraid of attitudes & behaviours that are different then theirs, more relaxed than theirs, more tolerant than theirs.

When the mood of the business is high, they seem harmless but when that mood is low, they can cause disruption, increase tensions & stress.

A challenge of Leadership is how to deal with them.

Try this;

1. Call them out – explain to them how they are making you & others feel
2. Ask for facts – can they prove it? Do they have specific examples?
3. Listen – give them the space to speak
4. Play it back – summarise back to them what they have explained
5. Be open – now explain how you see it
6. Thank them – recognise their opinion but politely & artfully disagree

Will they change? Probably not. But they will realise that you will call them on their behaviour & that you will defend others rights to think differently & to be able to express those differences in a safe environment, free from judgement.

Use your morals for the good of others, not to control others.