Stay positive. How many times have you heard that? How many times has someone said that to you? The thing is, you tend to get that advice when things aren’t going so well. It’s rare, that when everyone is happy, you’re succeeding in life and all is falling into place perfectly, that someone tells you to stay positive. Those two words tend to come when times are hard.
So what are we supposed to do with that advice? Firstly, all is not positive, so how can we stay positive. We’re not positive, not in the slightest! Yes, we are being pedantic on the language, because we can, because we’re not feeling chirpy or happy or remotely positive, so how about you take your stay positive and stick it. Sound familiar?
Well I wouldn’t blame you for that, however consider this. There are times when decisions need to be made, you know like restructuring a business, tendering for a contract, pitching for work, going for a promotion or job. These situations are extremely fluid, decisions are influenced by the hour, many people are involved. It’s natural to go through a cycle of thoughts and feelings on both sides, those making the decisions and those waiting on them. I call this the YES NO cycle.
You’re waiting to hear. Getting a YES is important to you. It means you can move forwards, progress. YES means security, challenge, the chance to develop new relationships, the opportunity to showcase your potential. This is big stuff. Time starts to pass, excitement turns to wondering, wondering turns to doubt, doubt turns to negativity. Silence is not only deafening, its paralysing! Here’s the crunch. Do you find your positive or do you free fall into your negative?
Let’s get one thing clear. Being positive or negative is a choice. No one forces you to do one or the other. It’s totally up to you. Be positive or be negative, but make sure you chose! Now I’ve got that off my chest consider this. In my experience one thing is absolutely certain, whoever is making the decision is absolutely watching your behaviour. They are looking to see how you are dealing with the silence, with the delay and I guarantee you and have countless examples of the person who finds their positive will succeed. Despite the doubt, despite the delay, the person who is positive, who continues to work towards a YES, who finds that extra, will always get the result they want.
Here’s why:
Positivity creates the perception of commitment, confidence, credibility, resilience, determination, patience, trust and maturity.
Negativity creates the perception of resignation, doubt, apathy, blame, criticism, lethargy, selfishness and dejection.
Imagine if those who are making that decision, the one that means everything to you, had a list like the one above. It doesn’t take much to realise which one they are going to be drawn to does it?
So next time someone says to you to stay positive, maybe a better way of putting it would be to find your positive. If you do this, you have a much better chance of getting your YES.