Have you noticed recently, that when you ask how someone is, you tend to get the same response. No matter who you ask.
It’s a kind of, slight shoulder shrug, nose scrunching, eyebrow raising thing. Every day’s the same, all rolling into one, doing exactly the same as I was yesterday and the day before and the day before type of response.
It’s all a bit Groundhog Day. (For those less than 25 years old,
Imagine working in a place where you feel recognised & valued, you feel part of something & you feel you can be yourself, no pretending, no facade, just be you. What would it be like working in a place like that?
As a leader you can enable this to happen.
So how can you? Try these;
1. Show Appreciation – find out what it is that makes those around you feel appreciated.
We all know that relationships are key. We feel connected & appreciated. We can be open, vulnerable, not have to pretend.
But it’s hard at the moment. Lot’s are remote, interactions are virtual. In a recent survey, 71% of managers are finding it hard to build relationships.
So what can we do? Try Showing Care.
Look at a relationship you have. Score 1-10.
1 there is no relationship,
People don’t half get on your nerves don’t they! They wind you up, they stress you out, they don’t listen, do whatever they want.
Well, that’s what we tell ourselves. The more we tell ourselves, the more we notice it. There’s a name for it. Psychologists call it ‘Conformation Bias’.
So, if we notice these things & they get on our nerves, which means we are stressed & tetchy, how useful is that?
Things just don’t seem to be improving, it’s tough for so many reasons for so many people. We are tapping into our inner resources so much & we’re all aware of the word resilience even more so than before. So what is resilience?
Well there’s so many different definitions & contexts, so for this let’s go with;
“leaning into yourself or others during times of difficulty so that you can become stronger”
How many times have you been asked to show someone how to do something? They need to do it & you are the one that knows it best. It’s a great compliment isn’t it? Recognised for your knowledge & ability. Makes you feel valued.
You start to explain, but it doesn’t seem to land with them. They find it hard to do it. Maybe it’s your explanation? Maybe it’s them? One things for sure,
I’m sure that whoever is reading this believes that you’re always learning, that you can always improve and develop. Well did you know there’s a theory about that?
It’s called a Growth Mindset and was coined by Carol Dweck.
At this moment there’s not much positive news. We’re all feeling constrained, we’ve got zoom fatigue, we have to plan those things that used to be spontaneous like visiting friends and family.
» Read more about: Self Leadership – Adopt a Growth Mindset »
“It’s not the load that breaks you down, it’s the way that you carry it.” CS Lewis
We all face challenges. Every day. Some big, some small, but challenges none the less. But what is a challenge?
Challenge can have a negative perception for some. It means burden, adversity, difficulty. Those perceptions may be true, may be false, but they are that person’s reality & that reality is negative.
Your perception,
» Read more about: Self Leadership – focus on your strengths »
We often think that adversity is a one-off event, so severe it takes every ounce of our focus. It can certainly be that, but it’s one version. It actually comes in many forms.
It impacts some more negatively than others. Same event, different perspectives. Some struggle, some flow through.
It seems risky to some, paralysing them, but for others, hardly makes them pause.
It has no plan or schedule.
» Read more about: Leadership Self Efficacy; dealing with adversity »
Success directly impacts the way we feel about ourselves. As leaders we are often expected to bring in huge, strategic, long term goals which take time and success can be a while off, impacting the view you have of yourself. So, try these;
Look out for quick wins.
Do things that you like to do.
Set small, achievable goals.
Do one thing at a time to completion.
» Read more about: Leadership Self Efficacy; build success and resilience »
Imagine this.
You’re sat at your desk, in your office, with your mobile by your side. You’re tapping away at the keyboard and your phone rings. On the screen it shows the name of your boss. What’s the first thing that comes into your mind?
Something positive? Something negative?
Now imagine this. You pick up your phone and ring one of your team. Your name appears on their screen as it rings.
We can’t ignore it. It’s everywhere and the impact it is
having is devastating. At the time of writing this, 10,000 people have lost
their lives to it.
Covid-19 or Coronavirus.
Globally, people have been told to stay at home, only leave
for essential journeys and then they must social distance. If they do not
follow this they can be fined, in some counties, jailed.
Why is it then that some people still go about their daily
lives like nothing is happening?
In my role as a facilitator, I’m an expert on nothing
really, but I know one thing; I do get lots of attention.
Stood in front of people, all listening to my every word,
doing the things I ask them to do. It’s a nice feeling. It’s a powerful
feeling.
Attention’s nice isn’t it?
So, how many followers do you have on Twitter? Instagram?
How many friends do you have on Facebook?
As soon as you assume the role of a leader, people take you far too seriously.
Bob Rubin, the one-time Secretary of the Treasury in the US Government, was touring the trading floor of Goldman Sachs, where he worked, and noticed there was hundreds of millions of dollars of gold on their books. When he asked why, he was told it was him. “Me!?” he replied. “Yes, you Sir. When you were last here,
We don’t like to admit that we are bias. But we are.
We prefer a particular brand, we prefer particular foods, colours, music, sports teams. But these aren’t really a problem.
It gets challenging when people are involved.
Subjects like gender, race, religion, age, these are sketchy territory. That’s why they are protected in businesses and rightly so. Companies have specific development programmes to raise awareness around them.
We’d struggle to openly admit that we have a bias in any of these areas.
I have a dig bick. You that read wrong. You read that wrong
too.
Shocking isn’t it?
Not the message, which after all makes no sense at all, but
the fact that we can get it so wrong. The reason, as you have probably guessed,
is all down to one simple thing: our brain’s persistent and hard-wired tendency
to take short cuts.
What you have just read comes directly from Professor Damian
Hughes book,
If I’m not in the best of moods, so what? Just because I’m having an off day or bad week, then as long as I don’t tell anybody, keep that stuff to myself, then who cares? It’s not as if it makes any difference, right?
I wonder how many of you reading this have had that conversation with yourself before?
It may be time to have a different conversation. In 2014 James Fowler and Nicholas Christakis carried out research into the power of happiness and sadness and the impact it has on others.
How many of you see yourself as a leader?
Some of you may have leader as a title. Some of you may lead people, other may lead process. Some of you may see leadership as a life choice. Whatever your view, then this is for you. Get ready for something that you’ve never heard before. You ready? OK.
Leadership is hard.
Bet some of you are just staring at this now aren’t you.
“There is no life I know to compare with pure imagination.” said Willy Wonka. Now most of you reading this will be familiar with the famous Roald Dahl story of the reclusive chocolatier who ran a competition for children to visit his famous factory upon presentation of a golden ticket found in certain Wonka bars. Some will remember Jonny Depp in the 2005 film adaptation, some of you, like me, will even remember Gene Wilder as Willy in the 1971 version.
We’ve got some exciting news to share with you all!
We have formed a working partnership with BMG Research, who are based in Birmingham and conduct in-depth research into market, customer and employee insights, public and business perception surveys.
BMG work with some fantastic clients such as University of London, the House of Commons, Suffolk County Council, the Welsh Government and the Open University to name just a few. They were established in 1988 and in that time have grown into an organisation with a trained and managed field force,
» Read more about: Exciting News! Fabric Learning and BMG Research announce a new partnership. »
