2023. It’s been a challenge.
Every year challenges us, some shared, some unique, challenges none the less.
This year though, has been the most challenging for me.
In bitter sweet irony, considering I’m researching for a PhD in Resilience, 2023 has tested my own & exhausted it, but more on that later.
To set context, in March, my Dad Graham, was diagnosed with prostrate cancer, assigned a treatment regime &
I’ve been a facilitator 18 years now & at times I’ve been asked by clients, “Why aren’t we seeing changes? Why are they still getting it wrong? Why isn’t the development working?”
For a second there’s a little bit of internal defensiveness which kicks in, followed by a bit of self-doubt, but I quickly remember something;
Development is a journey & patience is a virtue.
Whenever people go on their developmental journey,
My kids don’t believe me that there used to be a phone number that you would ring to find out the time.
That’s not the only thing. You could add to that vinyl records, cassette players, pay phones in big box on every street, I could go on.
The pace in which things change is mind blowing. For example, the year 2000 was 21 years ago. Yes, you read that right.
» Read more about: Your thinking won’t get you to the next part »
We all know that relationships are key. We feel connected & appreciated. We can be open, vulnerable, not have to pretend.
But it’s hard at the moment. Lot’s are remote, interactions are virtual. In a recent survey, 71% of managers are finding it hard to build relationships.
So what can we do? Try Showing Care.
Look at a relationship you have. Score 1-10.
1 there is no relationship,
“It’s not the load that breaks you down, it’s the way that you carry it.” CS Lewis
We all face challenges. Every day. Some big, some small, but challenges none the less. But what is a challenge?
Challenge can have a negative perception for some. It means burden, adversity, difficulty. Those perceptions may be true, may be false, but they are that person’s reality & that reality is negative.
Your perception,
» Read more about: Self Leadership – focus on your strengths »
Imagine this.
You’re sat at your desk, in your office, with your mobile by your side. You’re tapping away at the keyboard and your phone rings. On the screen it shows the name of your boss. What’s the first thing that comes into your mind?
Something positive? Something negative?
Now imagine this. You pick up your phone and ring one of your team. Your name appears on their screen as it rings.
In my role as a facilitator, I’m an expert on nothing
really, but I know one thing; I do get lots of attention.
Stood in front of people, all listening to my every word,
doing the things I ask them to do. It’s a nice feeling. It’s a powerful
feeling.
Attention’s nice isn’t it?
So, how many followers do you have on Twitter? Instagram?
How many friends do you have on Facebook?
We don’t like to admit that we are bias. But we are.
We prefer a particular brand, we prefer particular foods, colours, music, sports teams. But these aren’t really a problem.
It gets challenging when people are involved.
Subjects like gender, race, religion, age, these are sketchy territory. That’s why they are protected in businesses and rightly so. Companies have specific development programmes to raise awareness around them.
We’d struggle to openly admit that we have a bias in any of these areas.
If I’m not in the best of moods, so what? Just because I’m having an off day or bad week, then as long as I don’t tell anybody, keep that stuff to myself, then who cares? It’s not as if it makes any difference, right?
I wonder how many of you reading this have had that conversation with yourself before?
It may be time to have a different conversation. In 2014 James Fowler and Nicholas Christakis carried out research into the power of happiness and sadness and the impact it has on others.
How many of you see yourself as a leader?
Some of you may have leader as a title. Some of you may lead people, other may lead process. Some of you may see leadership as a life choice. Whatever your view, then this is for you. Get ready for something that you’ve never heard before. You ready? OK.
Leadership is hard.
Bet some of you are just staring at this now aren’t you.
Steve Jobs once said, “Your work is going to fill a large part of your life and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. The only way to do great work is to love what you do.”
I read a blog by Seth Godin recently where he talks about how the procedures, responsibilities and meetings at work get in the way of actually adding value.
